ugh

Yesterday went pretty well.. I actually ate a normal dinner with my parents...

.. Today, a different story. I was too tired/hungry to go to the gym this morning so I gave myself permission to take the day off. But then I wasn't "hungry" at lunch. So I didn't really eat.

Truth is I was/am hungry. I just don't know what to eat because I didn't exercise, really. I'm going to my grandma's soon, to celebrate her birthday. So that means cake, food. I wont' eat cake. I hate the sugary taste to cake. But I may be expected to eat dinner. Usually this isn't a problem but today, it poses big problems.

Yesterday I gave myself permission to eat. I just can't do it . What the hell am I so scared of?